


Of Shadow (From Light and Back Again)

by emrys (livingshitpost)



Series: the lion, the lamb, and the wolf [1]
Category: Warcraft (2016), Warcraft - All Media Types, World of Warcraft
Genre: Abduction, Aftermath, Aftermath of Torture, Aftermath of Violence, Altered Mental States, Alternate Canon, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Bathing/Washing, Begging, Blood, Blood and Gore, Blood and Injury, Blood and Violence, Bread, Bugs & Insects, Cannibalism, Canon-Typical Violence, Canonical Character Death, Captivity, Childhood Trauma, Corruption, Dehydration, Despair, Desperation, Dreams, Dreams and Nightmares, Emotional Baggage, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Emotionally Repressed, Eye Gouging, Eye Trauma, Face Slapping, Family, Family Angst, Family Feels, Family Issues, Family Reunions, Female Antagonist, Female Character of Color, Female Characters, Female Protagonist, Flashbacks, Food Issues, Forced, Forced Cannibalism, Forced Eye Contact, Fucked Up, Gay Anduin Wrynn, Gen, Gore, Graphic Description, Hallucinations, Hearing Voices, Holy Fire, Home, Homecoming, Humiliation, Hurt, Hurt No Comfort, Illusions, Implied/Referenced Torture, Injury Recovery, Isolation, Kidnapping, Leaving Home, Light Magic, Loss of Control, Loss of Faith, Loss of Parent(s), Manipulation, Mental Anguish, Mental Breakdown, Mental Health Issues, Mental Instability, Mild Blood, Mild Gore, Mild Sexual Content, Mind Control, Mind Control Aftermath & Recovery, Mind Manipulation, Minor Character Death, Minor Original Character(s), Mocking, Murder, Nightmares, No Incest, Non-Consensual, Non-Consensual Bondage, Non-Consensual Violence, Non-Sexual Bondage, Non-Sexual Submission, Not Canon Compliant - Warcraft (2016), Not Canon Compliant - World of Warcraft (Comics), Not Really Character Death, Nudity, Original Character-centric, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Paladins, Parent Death, Partial Mind Control, Physical Abuse, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Post-World of Warcraft: Cataclysm, Post-World of Warcraft: The Burning Crusade, Post-World of Warcraft: Wrath of the Lich King, Pre-World of Warcraft, Prisoner of War, Psychological Torture, Psychological Trauma, Public Humiliation, Public Nudity, Rape/Non-con Elements, Recovery, Restraints, Returning Home, Reunions, Royalty, Shadow magic, Shadowbending & Shadowbenders, Slapping, Starvation, Strong Female Characters, Tags Contain Spoilers, Torture, Trauma, Verbal Humiliation, Warcraft Lore, Whump, World of Warcraft: Cataclysm, World of Warcraft: Mists of Pandaria, World of Warcraft: The Burning Crusade, World of Warcraft: Wrath of the Lich King, Worms, [canned laughter], adultnabbing, but i feel bad not tagging things!!, holy magic, i'm not very confident writing gory stuff but o well, it takes aspects frm both sources, ok i'm gonna go to sleep now, or rather
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-18
Updated: 2019-02-08
Packaged: 2019-08-03 12:07:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 14
Words: 11,679
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16325945
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/livingshitpost/pseuds/emrys
Summary: "This is the call of the paladin; to protect the weak, to bring justice to the unjust, and to vanquish evil from the darkest corners of the world."A woman is torn apart at the seams. The Light stripped from her core, she is stitched back together with Shadow.





	1. light and dark are intertwined

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Whose Side Are You On](https://archiveofourown.org/external_works/424859) by Ruelle. 



> thalassian is sprinkled in throughout as a pseudo-latin, mostly religious language, along w some common bc i just like languages even if they're fake lmaO

"Good work," the orc said. She pulled out a small satchel of gold and silver coins, tossing it to the three human men before her. "Here's your pay."

"That's not gonna cut it, missy," the largest one of them sneered. "We had to do twice the work 'cause of that fuckin' princess."

"That's not my problem. You agreed to capture the King and deliver him to me. You did that. We're done here. Hand him over."

"We want double," one of the other men interjected, holding a blade to the unconscious king's throat. "Or you're not getting His Majesty from us." 

The orc's ears twitched. "Unless you want me to slit all of your throats right here, right now, you will hand the King of Stormwind over to me in the next ten seconds. You got your payment."

"Not in full!" The third man dragged himself out from behind the other two, lugging the sleeping Princess Royal along with him. "Seventy-five gold for one hostage, a one-fifty for two."

The orc's eyes sparkled, but she stood her ground. "That wasn't part of the deal," she muttered. "But it seems a shame to let such a valuable asset go to waste, doesn't it?" She reached for another satchel of gold on her hip. "I'll give you one-fifteen for the both of them."

"One-forty-five," the largest man demanded.

"One-twenty."

"One-forty."

"One-thirty-five, or we'll kill both of 'em."

"One-thirty, or I'll kill all three of you."

A moment of silence passed as the men considered this. The smaller two nodded to the larger, who grunted, seemingly appeased, and held out his hand as the captives were loaded into the orc's caravan. She gave him the additional fifty-five gold pieces and hopped aboard to take the reins. 

"Pleasure doing business with you," she said offhandedly. "Give the rest of the Defias my best."

The three men mounted their horses and rode off without a word.

The orc sighed, flicking the reins to get the horses pulling the caravan moving, and began to think about her next course of action. She would deliver the king to the Twilight's Hammer, that much was certain, but she now had another, unplanned hostage on her hands, and no plan for what to do with her.

She sighed, turning to look at the two sleeping humans behind her, both tied securely to the sides of the caravan. Both were skilled fighters, if the stories were anything to go by, and the Princess Royal was known to have an affinity for the Light. The orc pondered for a moment if she'd ever dabbled with other kinds of magic. After all, priests were known to defect to the Shadow, even if they didn't join the Council. Who said paladins couldn't be convinced do the same? 

* * *

The orc dragged her captive deep into the system of caves the Council used as a base, where the air was dry and dusty and cold, and chained her to the inside of a small, metal-barred cell to retrieve her arsenal of torture devices from various sectors of the tunnels.

The human woman was awake when she returned.

"Stay back, orc," she said. Her breaths were shallow, and her eyes flew around the room. "Come any closer and I'll kill you."

The orc smirked, tossing her bundle of wooden and metal tools onto a nearby table. "With what?" She put one hand on her hip and approached the little cell, calloused fingers brushing against the hilt of one of her daggers. "You're unarmed and stuffed into a cage like a  _dog_." The dagger flipped gracefully from its scabbard and twirled through her fingers before coming to rest in her fist. She struck quickly, getting a decent hit on the princess's upper arm. Crimson blood coated the tip of the blade and dribbled from the wound, slowly making its way to her shackles. The paladin shut her eyes tightly, but did not cry out.

"Interesting," the orc mused. "You'll be a joy to break, Wrynn."

Adariall sat still for a moment, breathing deeply to regain her composure, then lifted her head and spat through the bars at her captor.

"The Light will tear you apart, Halforcen," she said solemnly.

Garona wiped the saliva from her cheek and wiped it on the coarse hide of her pants. "Not if the Shadows get to you first." She turned on her heel and took the torch from beside the door. "Sleep well, _princess_."

The door shut, and Adariall was left alone in the silent darkness.


	2. how we ended up here

Garona had killed this woman's father, she realized a few days after acquiring the Princess Royal. Not because she knew that Llane had had a daughter, but she recognized the fury in her dark brown eyes, the way her lips curled around her teeth as she snarled and barked her defiance in inarticulate Orcish. She still tripped over her own tongue when she told her captor that she was born of rats and hogs, as she had been taught by her uncle years ago. It didn't come as a surprise; Anduin Lothar had barely been able to learn _that_ much.

The hinges of the door squeaked as she opened it and sauntered through, trailed by a shadow mage. 

"Get in her head," she instructed in quiet Eredun. "Find the memories of her father. Make her see him, then follow my lead."

The mage nodded, lifting their hands and chanting under their breath for a minute or so. Dark tendrils came forth from the ground in front of them, barely a foot away from the tiny cell, and took on a humanoid form while Adariall slept, slumped against the stone wall behind her. The shadows masterfully weaved themselves into the face of the fallen king, forming every inch of the armour exactly as she remembered it, before solidifying.

"Hide us, and wake her up," Garona whispered. "Gently."

The false king knelt as the edge of the room grew darker. He reached through the bars of the cell and shook Adariall's shoulder. "Ada?"

She didn't stir.

"Addie, wake up. Come on, princess. Wake up."

She grunted and turned slightly, pushing herself up from the stone wall and blinking a few times. "Wh . . . ?" She shook her head and squinted into the darkness. "Father?"

"Yes, Addie, it's me." He smiled softly. "Come on now, it's time to wake up."

"Father, h-how are you here?" She scrambled to her knees and leaned as close to him as she could. "You- you died. Vari and I saw Garona Halforcen kill you. I watched as she tore out your heart. Where is she?" She paused. "Is Mother with you?"

"No, sweetheart, your mother is at home. She's safe in the Keep. As for Garona, she won't be hurting you anymore. I've come to take you home."

Adariall blinked as her eyes welled up with tears. "Father, how-"

"Shh, not to worry, Addie." He stood before her, a reassuring smile on his face. "Everything is going to be alright."

Garona stepped forward, still shrouded in darkness, and silently pulled out her dagger, positioning herself being the false king just as she had years ago. She quickly took him by the throat and plunged the blade into his chest.

"Father!"

"Addie," the false king sputtered, blood dribbling from his lips. "Addie, why didn't you protect me?"

"Wh-what?"

"Addie . . ." He coughed, crimson drops flying from his mouth and landing on the ground before him. "You were always a great fighter . . . Why didn't you protect me?"

"F-Father, I-"

His eyes began to glow with a vicious purple light. " **WHY DIDN'T YOU KEEP YOUR DEAR FATHER SAFE, ADARIALL?** " He spoke with a thousand voices of the damned. " **WHY DIDN'T YOU FIGHT BACK?** " He fell to his hands and knees, reaching forward as the guise of flesh began to fall from his fingers. " **WHY DIDN'T YOU DO MORE?** "

Adariall put her forehead to the bars of her cell, tears streaming down her cheeks, and cried out. "I'm sorry, Father, I'm so sorry!" Her heaving breaths shook her entire body. "I should have saved you! I should have at least  _tried!_  I'm so sorry, Father!" She pulled her arms below her legs to grip the bars in front of her and reach fruitlessly for the shade of the king as he fell to pieces.

"And you said that the Light would  _tear me apart_." Garona spat on the floor where the false king had fallen. "You've failed your father yet again, Addie."

Adariall slowly looked up, the fire returning to her eyes as she grabbed the bars as tightly as she could. "You bastard!" She shouted. "You miserable, snivelling wretch!"

"I could say the same to you, you white-livered little girl."

"O Laras, soranok mi; agar'nathal, Daer'Darador, thar Or'Kalar!"*

Garona laughed. "The Light cannot reach you here, you drivelling moron." She squatted to look her victim in the eyes. "I will break you, you foolish, half-witted buffoon. This I swear to you."

Adariall let go of the bars of her cell and glared silently at her captor before spitting in her face.

Garona indignantly wiped the saliva from her cheek and flicked it to the floor. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *A fudged Common translation for "Oh light, bless me; your daughter, attendant of the people, and orc-slayer!" (i based it off stuff frm the wowpedia page lmao)


	3. it cuts deeper than a razor blade

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> warning fr gore/eye trauma ._.

Adariall's blood flowed slowly now, congealed and just beginning to scab over. She sat alone in the silent darkness. 

Her stomach growled weakly.

Someone laughed. It made her hair stand on end. "Hungry, are we?"

"Go to Hell," she replied flatly.

They tutted, this time seeming to come from another direction. "Don't bite the hand that feeds you, Princess; I thought you'd have better manners than this."

She didn't want to give them the satisfaction of a response.

"I have something for you. A gift, of sorts, if you wish to see it that way."

"I want nothing you have to offer me."

"Really now?" They were closer, now, probably kneeling before her. The blackness before her parted in the shape of hands to reveal what appeared to be a bread roll. "Not even this?"

Heat radiated from it. It was fresh, she quickly realized, and her mouth watered just a bit. 

"Go on," they said cooly. "Take it."

She was so hungry.

It was warm and moist and sweet. She savoured it as best she could.

Something squelched between her teeth.

Her ears perked up in alarm as she pulled the roll away. A worm writhed within the dough, trying to burrow back inside, away from her mouth, as if seeking safety. She tore it apart with her hands, revealing a cold, wriggling mass.

"What in Light's name . . ."

They laughed again. "Eat up, Princess."

* * *

One of the cuts on her upper arm had reopened. She held her hand against it in an attempt to staunch the flow of blood, but it stung and burned to the point where there were tears in her eyes. She leaned back against the bars and tried to focus on the cool metal against her skin.

She wished she could sleep. 

Her eyes closed of their own accord, though it admittedly made no difference. She loosened the grip on her arm, peeling it away from the bloody mess, and let her assumedly gore-stained hand fall into her lap. Her head found purchase resting between the bars of her cage. She could almost imagine that she was sitting against the window of her bedroom after a hard-fought battle, her brother just across the hall, and his son only a few doors down. Surely she would awaken in the morning to the faintest smell of eggs and bacon wafting down from the dining hall; Anduin would already have his nose in a book at the table; Varian would nearly be done, perhaps already sparring with one of the guards in the pavilion overlooking the pond, or else reading over some of the paperwork he so despised . . .

An ice cold drop of water fell directly on her forehead through the ceiling bars.

She opened her eyes again, blinking a few times. There was nothing to be seen above her, but the frigid drops continued. She tried to turn around to catch them in her mouth, but the source of the water moved along with her, perfectly synchronized. It dripped down her face painfully slowly. Perhaps if she tilted her head, she could get it to flow into her mouth, even if at a snail's pace. Though it surely wouldn't be enough to keep her alive for very long.

The door was flung open and she was thrown into blinding light. She hissed though her teeth, bringing her hands to her eyes, which destroyed the careful rivulet of water carving its way down her cheek.

Garona said something in Eredun. A figure beside her muttered an incantation. A door appeared on the cage, as it had many times before, along with shackles around the woman's wrists. The door was opened so the orc could grab grab Adariall by the hair and pull her out of the tiny cell. Another incantation and there were shackles on her ankles, keeping her feet about a foot apart.

"Come with me."

"Fuck you."

Garona slapped Adariall with the back of her hand. "I gave you an order. You will obey."

She panted for a moment, eventually shaking her head with a harsh sigh as if to shake off the pain itself. She held her head high, but said nothing, only looking down her nose at her captor.

Garona only smiled. "You really are a delight," she mused. "If circumstances were different . . ." She trailed off, seeming to be lost in thought, then barked out a laugh. "Then again, I very nearly fucked your uncle."

Adariall fought the intensely strong instinct to use the chain between her wrists to strangle the orc before her. 

The feeling of cold steel against her back kept her moving through the dim, dry corridors of the cave system. The air grew cooler as they continued, causing the hair on her bare arms and legs to stand on end. The two of them passed various members of the Council as they walked, some of whom averted their eyes, but most stared, smiling smugly and laughing. A couple of them even congratulated Garona on her 'prize.' She didn't reply, but Adariall could tell that it was only stoking the flames of her ego.

"What game are we going to play this time?" She asked as the orc brought her into a small room. "Gonna make me see my father again? My mother, perhaps? Lothar?"

"Be quiet," she barked as she lit the torch by the door.

"You're going to hurt me either way; I might as well deserve it in your eyes. Might make it easier." She laughed dryly. "Then again, you've never needed a reason to do terrible things before."

Garona shoved her captive towards a table in the middle of the room. In the low light, it almost looked like a bed.

"Get up on that."

"Ooh, traditional torture," she noted, though she did comply. "Not feeling very creative today, are we Halforcen?"

"I told you to be quiet." She pulled leather straps from the underside of the surface and used them to secure the paladin in place. She removed the handcuffs, tying her wrists down as well.

"And I told you to die in a hole. Neither of us are going to get what we want anytime soon."

"Implying that I'm to die in a hole. Bold of you, considering the situation you find yourself in." She pulled a dagger from her hip and stuck it into the table in one fluid motion. "This is going to take longer than I would like, but that will only make the reward all the more worth it."

"The reward of my freedom?"

"You wish."

She laughed bitterly. "Can't blame me for trying."

Garona pulled the blade from the table and twirled it in her hands. Adariall's eyes followed her every movement as she circled her prisoner; a shark considering its prey.

"You're right handed," she said finally. It wasn't a question.

"And?"

She stopped flipping the knife and plunged it into her left hand. Adariall cried out suddenly, white flashing across her vision before she shut them tightly, as though to shield herself. She reached instinctively for the Light, and it did lessen the pain somewhat, but the overwhelming darkness that filled the tunnels greatly dampened the effects. She took several deep, heaving breaths, fighting for control once more.

The human woman smiled; weakened, but defiant. "Is that all you can do?"

"I'm glad you asked." Garona pulled another knife from her other hip and rested the tip above Adariall's left eyebrow. "This might cause some discomfort," she said coolly, slowly applying pressure and relishing in her abductee's hisses and low whines. They only grew louder as she continued down her face, continuing to press harder against her skin, eventually splitting her thin eyelids and piercing her very eye. The woman's screams turned to roars rather than shrieks, thankfully, as the thick, clear fluid mixed with the crimson blood already streaming freely from the laceration above. She drove the knife deeply into her eyeball, and was somewhat surprised to realize that Adariall's screaming had not faltered. She showed no sign of fatigue, despite having not properly eaten or slept for nearly a week. She was on the brink of death, and yet . . .

Garona smiled as she brought the knife down Adariall's cheek, then pulled it away when the screams had died down a bit, and leaned in close to her ear. 

"I gave you an order," she said softly. "You will obey."

Adariall panted loudly. This time, there was no bold retort.

"Good girl." Garona pet her captive's head for a moment before she left the room.


	4. nothing is clear

She must have laid there for days. Lower ranking warlocks came in and poured hot water into her mouth too quickly for her to drink, burning her throat and face, and crammed in more of the vile, infested rolls. And yet she ate them. She had nothing else. The way her face moved as she cried only intensified the pain of her untended eye. The crusty dried blood made her face feel stiff. The cold seeped deep into her hands and feet, and not even the Light could grant her solace. 

" _O Laras_ ," she muttered softly, " _uden agar'nathal._ * Deliver me peacefully unto you."

"No."

Adariall blinked. She strained to move her head to look around the dark, empty room, but found nothing.

"Who's there?"

"Nobody."

She scoffed. "Someone has to be."

"No, not really."

"And yet we're holding a dialogue."

" _You_ are holding a dialogue. _I_ am not here."

"I'm not listening to you."

"Clearly."

"Light; just stop talking."

"Then stop talking to yourself." 

* * *

It was several more weeks before Garona reappeared. Adariall roused as the door opened, squeaking loudly on its hinges, and tried to squash down the sense of relief that washed over her when she recognized the orc.

"Thought you'd forgotten about me," she said. Her voice was hoarse.

"I would never forget my favourite prisoner," Garona replied flatly. She poked at the hole through Adariall's left hand, smirking as she hissed, and he licked the blood from her finger. "Now, what did we learn?"

"That you're a bitch?"

Garona pressed her thumb deep into the wound. "I asked you a question," she said calmly. "What did we learn?"

"How to be a despicable, cruel- fuck!"

"Wrong again." She could feel the bones of her hand parting beneath the pressure. "What did we learn about  _you_?"

"That I'll kill you as soon as I get out of here."

She drove her thumb clean through. Blood spilled over the table and dripped to the floor. She waited until the screaming had peaked, then begun to die down, to pull out one of her daggers and hold it to her captive's throat.

"We learned that you will obey me, or you will be broken."

* * *

"Addie," she heard Varian whisper. "Addie."

"Varian?"

"Addie."

"What is it?"

"Addie."

"Varian, this isn't-"

"Addie."

"Stop it!"

"Addie."

"Leave me alone!"

"Addie."

* * *

Anduin was screaming just outside. She prayed with everything in her that they were just trying to get in her head again.

He just kept screaming. 

* * *

Golden and violet lights danced in front of her face. She couldn't be sure if she was dreaming; she even ached in her sleep at this point.

The gold started out larger, but the violet was greater in numbers. The gold shined brighter, more beautifully, but the violet surrounded it from all sides. The gold fought valiantly, but the violet whittled it down. The gold grew dimmer and dimmer, and eventually, its light was extinguished. The violet reached down and tenderly brushed her cheeks. She thrashed, screaming, praying to the Light to help her, but it was as if it was gone from the world entirely. Her tensing muscles reopened her wounds and she was coated once again in sticky, viscid gore, forced to lie in her own blood. Finally, she let her lower lip tremble, and she cried.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *another fudged common translation, this time meaning "oh light, help your daughter."


	5. you want glory

Adariall had lost track of the days some time ago.

"What have we learned?" Garona asked her.

"I will obey," she replied quietly. Garona smacked her stomach harshly, and she repeated herself. "I will obey," she said, this time much louder.

"Good girl. And?"

"Should I fail, I will be punished."

"Very good." Garona reached for the clasps of the leather straps that had kept her down for so long, slowly undoing them. "Get up."

Adariall sat up slowly, carefully, wincing as she unpeeled her skin from the table. She waited silently for further instruction.

"No witty retorts?" 

"No."

Garona smiled cruelly. "Shame." She put a metal collar around the woman's neck with three chains attached, who of which ended in cuffs for her wrists. She used the third to pull her prisoner along. "Come on."

It was hard enough to walk with her feet forced so awkwardly far apart, but now they were weak from lack of use. Adariall fell to the ground, grunting when Garona pulled on her chain leash.

"I gave you an order," Garona threatened.

"Yes," came the quiet reply. She struggled to her feet, wobbling slightly, and stumbled along behind her captor out of the room.

"I kind of miss your attitude," Garona admitted as they walked. "But seeing you reduced to such a state has its own appeal." She unlocked the door to a room filled with caged prisoners, some of whom were chatting idly, but stopped as soon as the two of them entered.

"Pick one of them," Garona said. "Any one you like."

"Wh-"

"Don't ask questions. I gave you an order."

A nod. She turned to face the others, eventually landing on a sin'dorei woman with dirty, matted red hair. "That one," she said. "In the cage by herself."

A few of the lone captives looked up, fearful, but relief washed over most of them as they saw that the human wasn't talking about them. The sin'dorei she was referring to simply lowered her head.

Garona nodded to a warlock off to the side of the room as she freed Adariall's ankles and left hand, then presented her with one of her daggers. "You want to eat, right?"

"Yes-"

"Then kill her."

Adariall swallowed thickly. The sin'dorei stood, revealing that, though she appeared far healthier than Adariall surely looked, there was hardly anything to her. Her glowing green eyes were dull and empty as she, too, was presented with a dagger, and she held it lamely with her thin, limp fingers.

"Band'or ronae talah,"* she said. "I don't envy you either way."

"Same to you," Adariall replied, and she lunged forward. The elf dodged out of the way, but was knocked to the ground when the former princess kicked her legs out from underneath her. "But I can't really say I'm sorry." She slammed her foot down onto the elf's bare chest with a sickening  _crack_ and a pained scream from the woman beneath her. She quickly took her blade to her throat and made a deep cut. She gurgled and spat and cried for a moment, then went still. Her eyes continued to glow.

"Very good," Garona cooed, taking the blade from the human woman. "You've earned yourself a nice meal."

Adariall was silent. She prayed to the Light that her dinner wouldn't be very heavy on the meat.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ever so slightly fudged thalassian for "prepare for peaceful death"; she's essentially saying "either die quick or kill me quick"


	6. face to face

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> uh yeah this is where the cannibalism is. please don't eat people

She was crammed back into her cell as she waited for her meal. She closed her eyes for a moment.

She was thirteen years old again.

Her heart was racing. She held her little brother's hand tightly, pulling him through the corridors of the castle, eventually coming up on the throne room as they searched for their father.

An orc was standing before him. They knew her; Garona Halforcen. She was a friend of the family. One of the few hopes for peace with the Orcish Horde.

"Bad news, Sire," she said. "The clans are united under Blackhand in his assault. They will stand together until Stormwind has fallen. Gul'dan is bringing up his warlocks by nightfall. Until then, the Blackrock Clan will be trying to take the Eastern wall."

"We will hold until the reinforcements come," Llane replied. "As long as men with stout hearts are manning the walls and the throne, Stormwind will hold."

"The orc leaders agree with your assessment," she said, and she quickly pulled her blade, stabbing her father in the chest. She straddled his body as he fell to the floor, tearing open the flesh of his chest to reach his very heart, and cut it out. She held it there for a moment as it went slack in her grip.

"Addie," Varian started, quieter than he'd ever been, but she only took his hand tighter and they turned a corner to hide from the traitor.

"Addie, she-"

"I know, Vari." She held her brother close as they slipped into a closet.

"She killed Dad. She was  _crying_."

"I know, Vari; be quiet. She'll hear us."

The city was burning outside. People were screaming, though it was muffled by the thick stone walls of the Keep. She knelt beside her brother and held him tightly. 

A guard pulled them from the closet and escorted them out of the Keep.

"Where's Mother?"

"I don't know where Her Majesty is, Your Highness," the guard said as they helped the prince and princess onto their horse. "My job is to keep the two of you safe. Keep you  _alive_."

Commands were shouted in Common and Orcish alike. 

"LOK-TAR!"

"AN KARANIR LANDOWAR!"*

"Come on!"

Varian cried into his sister's back as they rode down to the docks.

"Adariall! Varian!"

"Uncle Lothar! Where is-"

"Your mother is already on the ship. Where's your father?"

"He- Garona- She betrayed him. She . . ."

"Alright, hey. It's alright." He helped his niece and nephew down and ushered them onto the boat.

"Mother!"

"Addie, Vari!"

"Mother, I'm scared."

"I know, sweetheart, I know."

Adariall couldn't help but turn back to look at the flaming city against the dark sky. People were scrambling, trampling one another in their attempts to get to safety. Orcs set fire to storefronts and homes alike; she could see the Mage Tower burning. The roof of the cathedral was alight, but it was so very far from holy. The smell of burning flesh filled her nostrils and she turned to hide in her mother's freely flowing hair.

When next she opened her eyes, Garona was before her again, opening the door of her cage.

"Dinnertime," she said simply.

She wasn't restrained this time, but the orc led her from behind with a dagger. She was brought to a surprisingly well-lit room with a long dining table and one chair at each end. Garona waited for her captive to take a seat, then crossed the room to sit across from her.

"I hope you like meat." A cruel smile flashed across her face.

Adariall said nothing.

An assortment of seared flesh was placed on the table; ribs, sausage, and what Adariall hoped was the flank of a wolf (though she knew it wasn't). Finally, a head was placed at the very center of the table. The green eyes of the sin'dorei had dimmed slightly, but continued to stare at her, slack-jawed.

"Go ahead and eat," Garona encouraged. "I know you're hungry."

She wanted to tear into the thigh and rip apart the steak with her teeth. She wanted to pull the meat from the ribs and stab Garona in the throat with the remaining bone. She was so hungry. She was so repulsed.

"I'm not," she said quietly.

Her stomach growled.

"Aren't you?"

Her stomach rose into her throat, pressing against the very back of her tongue, as she reached for the sausage and took a bite. It took her far too long to be able to swallow, and her stomach even protested the food for which it had begged so much. Her breaths were heavy and laboured as she struggled to keep it down. 

"Now, isn't that better than rolls filled with bugs? Aren't you glad I'm letting you have such good food?"

No response. The sausage was ripped from her hands.

"Say thank you."

"Go to Hell."

There was a swift  _crack_ against her cheek with the butt of a sword.

Garona sighed. "Put her back in the cage; I have more important things to do."

"What about-?"

"It's hers. But leave the head out of her reach. And make sure the room is lit."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *more fudged common! "long live the alliance"


	7. there's a tear in my heart

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> more cannibalism yipes

Somehow, the food kept. For weeks and weeks alone, it kept.

"I'm sorry," She said softly, trying to keep from looking at the head sitting on the ground a few paces away from her cage. She tore into one of the steaks with her teeth. "Light, this is disgusting," she muttered through the mouthful of food. "But at least one of us is eating."

"Pity it's you."

She laughed bitterly. "Yeah. Kinda wish she'd just killed me, y'know?"

"But either way, now there's nobody to help your brother."

"He'll be fine on his own."

"And if he isn't? What of your nephew?"

"He . . . He's got a good heart. And Bolvar is with him. He'll be alright, and he'll be a great king one day. Jaina will be there for him too, so-"

"He's already lost his mother."

Her hands stilled. 

"Now he's lost his aunt, maybe his father; who's to say he isn't dead himself?"

"He's fine," she snapped. "They wouldn't kill him. He's just a boy."

"A boy who will one day be king. Provided he lives that long."

"He  _will_. He'll be fine."

"He's only ten."

"So was Varian."

"And look at how he turned out. Look at how  _you_ turned out. Angry and nearly unable to form stable connections with people — you don't want that for him, do you?"

"He's not like me. He's not like  _us_. He's-"

"You know his father. And he's just as much drawn to the Light as you are. If  _you_ can be warped like that, who's to say the same won't become of him? (Assuming he isn't dead, that is.)"

She turned to glare at the severed head. "You don't know what you're talking about," she spat.

"Don't I?"

"Be  _quiet_!" She squeezed her eyes shut. She couldn't waste what little water she had like this. "Be quiet, be quiet, be quiet! Just shut  _UP_ already!" She buried her fingers in her loosening curls and pulled until her scalp burned. "Please," she sobbed. " _Please_."

Silence.

She opened her eyes, and the head of the sin'dorei woman was staring back at her. Her eyes were like two green orbs of stained glass, just as before, but the light no longer shined from behind them. Her tongue sat lazily at the very edge of her parted lips.

"I'm sorry," she said again. "Light, I'm so sorry. I didn't want to . . ."

No response.

"You didn't deserve to die," she murmured. Her voice threatened to break. "I'm sorry. I don't- I wish I hadn't . . ."

(She wished she hadn't made it this long.)


	8. there's no hiding

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this one's vaguely nsfw (mention of female-presenting nipples but nothing explicitly sexual)

Normally she would have been relieved to be pulled from her cell and allowed to stand. Now, there was nothing.

"Have you enjoyed your meal, Princess?"

She didn't answer.

Garona gave her a swift jab to the ribs.

"I'm not going to repeat myself."

"Nh . . . Yes," she said, and then added, "thank you."

The orc picked gingerly at loose strands of Adariall's hair that had fallen from her bun. "Been a while since you've been clean, hm?"

She nodded.

"I can't hear you."

"Yes."

"I think you'd like to be clean again. I certainly don't want to have to keep looking at you like this."

 _You did this to me_ , something in the back of her mind spat, but she kept it quiet. Her lips barely twitched.

"Come with me."

"Yes."

She kept her eyes trained on the floor in front of her as Garona led her from behind. There was no blade pressed to her spine, but she still hurried, fearing what might happen if she didn't. She waited silently as the orc opened a door. She didn't enter until she was told to do so with a shove.

There was a trough of water on the side of the room. The floor was wet and dirtier than the rest of the cave system.

"Let's get you clean, then. Stand here."

She did as she was told, not saying a word as Garona shackled her ankles and wrists so she couldn't get more than a few inches from the wall. Her captor picked up a damp washcloth from the basin and let the cold water drip over her bare breasts. Her nipples hardened. She squeezed her eyes shut once again. Blood rushed to her face and, for once, she was grateful for the darkness.

Garona washed her too gently. The soft scrubbing made her stomach turn. She wanted to scour herself until she bled anew, and then continue to wipe the blood from her wounds — maybe there would be nothing left when she was done. That didn't sound too bad, actually.

The orc tutted softly as she inspected Adariall's eye. "That must hurt," she mocked. "You're lucky it isn't infected. Shadow can heal, yes, but for those as Light-bound as yourself . . ." She smirked. "They tend to beg for death."

Her breath rattled in her chest. "Thank the Light."

A harsh slap across the face. "The Light cannot reach you here, whelp." She spat. "Or do you need another reminder?"

"N-no! No, no no,  _please_."

Garona laughed. "I love it when you beg." She wiped some of the dried blood and tears from her face. "Don't worry; I don't intend to have you healed anytime soon. The aftermath of a healed prisoner's newfound strength outweighs the joy of seeing them writhe in agony. And your wounds aren't quite killing you yet, so I see no reason to hasten your recovery." 

Adariall closed her eyes and tried to remember the Cathedral of Light. She tried to pull the faces of her fellow Light-wielders from her memories, but they were warped in a way she couldn't define. Angela, Laurena, Arthur; even the altar boys. Their eyes all glinted with darkness. Or perhaps they'd always done that, and she'd just never been paying attention? Her memories of the Light were becoming more and more difficult to find, and when she did, it seemed blinding. She opened her eyes to remind herself of the darkness.

Garona didn't speak to her again until she was back in her cell.

"There's more to this world than your father taught you," came the soft call. "You're capable of more."

She hung her head as the door closed once again.


	9. there's a war in my head

She had called out to the Light for several days now, but her labours bore no fruit. Once, she recalled, she had brought the Light to her little brother's aid simply by hushing him gently and rocking his small body. He had been only three at the time, and she only six, but it was at that point that her father decided she was to train with the priestesses as soon as she was able. She hadn't even been trying; she'd simply wanted little Varian to stop his cries. And yet it came so easily to her.

But now, after she'd long since lost track of the days, it had left her empty and cold.

She sat in the very corner of her tiny cage, curled against the stone back wall. Her training reverberated in her skull, deafening her to even her hunger;  _paladins must reflect the Light_. To be a paladin was to be a holy warrior of justice and honour and  _hope_. And yet here she sat, alone in the darkness, wondering about the shadows.

She sighed shakily, holding her hand up before her. "Anar'ren," she whispered; "vendel'o."*

Black and blue tendrils snaked up her legs and torso, eventually coming all the way to her fingertips and drifting lazily between them. The tiny cell was illuminated with a soft purple glow.

Her hands were numb. Her very  _mind_ was numb. She felt cold and damp and as if someone had lathered her with honey and mud. The warmth of the Light had slipped from her grasp, replaced by the empty chill of the Shadow, and her chest felt as though it were collapsing in on itself.

 _The Light has abandoned me_ , she reasoned.  _So I have done the same to it._

"Eth'razzqi worg zz oou," the darkness whispered back. "Gul'kafh an'shel."

"En'othk," she murmured. "Y'za kyth mh uulwi . . ."

"Oou thyzz lal ak'uq qwaz zuq shkul ma sk'tek; aglathrax hig'thrixa. Ull vera skish."

"Y'za ilfah."**

It soaked into her very bones. She faintly remembered the gown she had worn so often as a child; soft and light and powder-purple. Its colour darkened slowly in her mind until it was damn near black, and the constant burning of her left eye gave way to a dull ache. Garona's words echoed in her mind; "you're capable of more." She allowed the shadows to wash over her, slowly but surely healing the scrapes and bruises that littered her weakened form.

* * *

"Make sure we aren't seen," Garona said in quiet Eredun. "She cannot see or hear anything we do, do you understand?"

"Yes, Interpreter Halforcen," a warlock replied.

She nodded and opened the door. The hinges were silent, and a thick blanket of shadow covered the door to the dimly lit hallway. They passed through and Garona knelt by the cage. She blinked a few times as her eyes adjusted to the darkness. Eventually, she made out Adariall sitting in the corner of her cell, not quite awake nor sleeping. Her entire body was coated in a film of violet energy as she mumbled soundlessly in a tongue Garona couldn't quite recognize.

The orc smiled. 

"Things are coming along nicely," she whispered as she stood once more. "Perhaps a few more days alone, and then we can begin to retrain her."

"You've done a remarkable job, Interpreter Halforcen. The Alliance will not trifle with us after they see your work."

"Damn right they won't. Especially not with Varian gone. Fordragon may be the one truly in charge, but Anduin is only a scared child. He wouldn't be brave enough to come after her even if he knew where she was." She turned to leave the room with a surprising spring in her step. "Come on. I'm done here."

"Forgive me, Interpreter Halforcen," the warlock said as they followed their superior, "but didn't you once say the same of Varian himself?"

Garona stopped and whipped around. "What are you implying?"

"N-nothing! It's just that you spent a considerable amount of time with him when he was a boy, but when you killed Llane, he didn't shrink the way you'd expected him to. You can't make the same assumption this time. You don't know Anduin as well as you know Varian. We must be cautious, lest history repeat itself."

A growl rose in Garona's throat, but it died down slowly as she considered the warlock's advice. She cleared her throat. "I will keep that in mind," she muttered. "But it would do you well not to speak out of turn anymore."

"Yes, Interpreter Halforcen. Thank you."

"Don't try to kiss my ass."

"My apologies."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *fudged thalassian for "by the shadow, help me"  
> **slightly fudged shath'yar for "all light fades and dies. gaze into the void."  
> "there is no light. i see only writhing darkness..."  
> "the contagion has taken root within you; i reside within your lungs. you are mine."  
> "i am yours."


	10. betrayal burns

When Varian was reformed, his sister was nowhere to be found. She had been missing for nearly six months. His son is eleven now, and he is thirty-five. Adariall would be thirty-nine.

That day was her birthday.

He sparred with Anduin in the pavilion; he with his sword, and Anduin with the holy magic he'd been practicing. If the King closed his eyes, it felt almost as though . . .

"Father," the boy said suddenly, "are you alright?"

Varian looked up from the dissipating Light in his son's hands. "Of course," he said simply. "Come on. Let's keep going."

But Anduin let his hands fall to his sides. He kicked absently at the dirt. "I know you're not big on feelings, but-"

"I said I'm  _fine_ , boy," he snapped, then steadied his breath. "Don't worry about me."

Anduin worried his lip. "It's just . . ."

Varian sighed, sitting on one of the benches and propping Shalamayne against the ground. 

"I know  _I_ missed  _you_ while you were gone," he said quietly. "It's alright if you're mourning."

A non-commital grunt was all the prince got in response. He continued nonetheless.

"You've lost a lot, I know. I'll never truly know the weight of your grief." He sat beside his father and, after a moment of brief hesitation, put a hand on his scarred shoulder. "But I'm here for you."

Varian chuckled. He turned to his son with a smile. "You're so very much like your mother," he remarked. "Thank you for your concern, Andy, but you shouldn't be having such adult anxieties. You're still just a boy; you should be playing like any other child."

"But I'm  _not_ any other child, Father; I'm the Prince of Stormwind." He smiled mischievously. "I'm practicing being there for my people so they might not be as mad when my consort isn't a woman."

His father barked with laughter. "That's a good plan," he said, ruffling Anduin's hair. "Very diplomatic of you."

"Thank you; it's kind of the point."

"Your Majesty!" One of the champions (a younger human rogue named Ellayne) said, slightly out of breath. "Warden Thelwater sent me; there's something you need to see."

Ellayne led the king out of the Keep and mounted her horse, bouncing her leg as she waited for him to get one of his own, trailed by his son.

"Stay in the Keep," he ordered. "I don't know what's going on down there; I don't want you getting hurt."

"Father, with all due respect-"

"That's an order!"

Anduin grumbled and mounted one of the horses anyway to follow his father.

"Your Majesty, Thelwater told me to warn you; this is going to come as a shock. It certainly did to the rest of us."

"Just spit it out, then!"

"Your sister is alive."

Had he not been mounted, he would have stopped dead in his tracks. "Are you sure?"

"Yes. We've had the best mages in the city perform countless tests; there's no denying it. Adariall Wrynn is definitely still kicking."

"Then why are we going to the Stockades?"

"Something happened during her time away. We aren't sure what, but it's had a substantial effect on her. She . . . She isn't herself."

Anduin came up on Ellayne's other side. "What do you mean?"

"Anduin-!"

"Father. She's not just your sister. She's helped me to learn the ways of the Light ever since I began my training; I need to see her just as much as you do."

Varian sighed. "Fine. Champion?"

Ellayne adjusted her grip on the reins of her steed. "I'm sure you're both aware of the fact that priests can follow the Light or the Shadow, yes?"

"Of course," Anduin replied. "My training actually includes a balance of both forces."

"Exactly."

Varian shook his head. "But Adariall is a  _paladin_  — they can only follow the Light."

"According to tradition, yes. But just as priests can fall to Shadow, so too can paladins. She still uses magic to enhance her prowess as a swordswoman, just as any other paladin of the Light, but the energy coming from her is no longer bright and holy."

Varian leaned backward on his horse as they approached the stockades.

As the trio dismounted, the young prince couldn't help but to worry about what awaited them. 

"Anduin, go back to the Keep."

"What?"

"That's an  _order_ , Anduin Llane."

The boy scoffed. "Because you know what you're doing?"

"Of course I don't," the king barked. "None of us know what we're doing! But I need you to stay  _safe_. We all do."

"And Aunt Addie needs to be reminded of the Light," the prince retorted. "Who else will do it?"

"Ellayne, go get Bishop-"

"Every second we waste waiting for them to come back, the Shadow eats away at her mind," Anduin interrupted, expression set. "We need to do this as quickly as we can."

"You've only been training for a couple of years, I-"

"Your Majesty," Ellayne interjected, "with all due respect, His Highness is right. We need to move quickly."

Varian looked between the two of them, eventually caving with a sigh. He gripped the rogue's shoulder tightly. "If anything happens to my son," he growled, "I will throw you to the Wolf."

She simply nodded. "Of course, My King."

He nodded, released her, and the three of them entered the prison. 


	11. whose side are you on?

_The Light approaches_ , she thought to herself. The warmth seemed to burn her very skin. She lifted her head to see what was happening. Three figures stood before her. One, she did not recognize, but the others . . .

 _Imposters_ , she spat in her mind. A growl started low in her throat.

Varian approached slowly. "Adariall?"

"My brother is dead," she said flatly. "Get out of my sight."

He paused at that. His stomach was tight in his gut. "Addie, you know me."

"Of course I do. Your name is Varian Wrynn. You broke your collarbone when you were eight years old. And you are  _dead_. I won't be fooled again."

He knelt to face his sister. "But I'm not," he said firmly. "I'm right here. I want to help you."

She laughed hollowly. "That's what you said last time you came to me." There was a beat of silence. "Though you didn't have that scar across your face."

"That's because it's really me, Addie."

"No. She's just trying to trick me again." Another hollow laugh. "Well, it won't work this time, Garona! I've  _learned_  from my mistakes, alright? I'm not going to fail you again!"

"Garona?"

Adariall glared at her brother. "If you were my brother, you would  _know_  who she was."

"I do, Addie. I do. Garona Halforcen." His tongue was thick in his mouth. "She killed Father."

The violet aura surrounding the woman flickered. "Vari?"

"We hid in a closet," he continued. "You held me and kept me quiet. One of the guards came and found us — Randall, I think — and brought us to the docks. We sailed to Lordaeron with Mother and Uncle Lothar, though she died on the way there. We met Arthas, remember? And that paladin . . ." He smiled fondly. "That's when you started your training in the Light."

She stared at him long and hard. The glow around her continued to fade for a moment, then she set her jaw, and it returned just as strong and dark and cold as it had ever been. "They've gotten in my head before," she said quietly. "I can't trust a fucking thing you say." She leaned back and looked pointedly away from him. "Get out of my sight."

Varian's breath caught in his chest, if only for a fraction of a second. He sighed and rose to his feet. "I know you're in there," he said, somewhat sadly. "Garona already took our mother and father; I won't let her take you, too."

Anduin bit his lip and put a hand on his father's arm, which was shrugged off. He sighed quietly and called upon the Light to dance across his palm. "Aunt Ada?"

No response.

He tossed the holy energy from hand to hand, eventually letting it pass into the cell.

She refused to look at him, but her expression softened.

"You're the one who first trained me in the ways of the Light," he said softly. "I don't what's happened to make you turn your back on it, but I know that you are still one of the greatest paladins of the Holy Light I've ever met." He waved his hand and the orb burst into a shower of sparks, raining gently down on the woman before him. Her eyes tracked the flakes of golden light as they fell around her, and she reached up to catch one of the smaller ones in her hand. It thrummed soothingly, lingering a bit longer than the others had.

"It's warm," she murmured. "I didn't think that members of the Shadow Council were allowed to wield the Light." A smirk graced her lips. "Or that you were even able."

"That's because I'm not a member of the Shadow Council," he assured her. "It's really me." He loosely gripped the bars of her cell.

"Your Highness-"

"I know what I'm doing." His voice was level and calm. "Aunt Ada, I know you recognize me. And I know you recognize the Light." He extended his hand to her. "I know you're in there. We all do. And we're not going to give up on you."

Adariall turned to face her nephew. She glanced at his hand, then stared him right in the eyes.

"I killed you," she said, her voice barely above a whisper. "Your death was not merciful."

"Anduin-"

"That wasn't really  _me_ , alright? I'm fine. I'm right here. You said it yourself; they got in your head." He reached his hand out a bit farther. "I want to help you."

She looked to his hand once more, this time taking it, though tentatively. She encased it with both of her hands and tears fell freely down her cheeks.

"I didn't want to do it," she sobbed softly. "I never wanted to hurt you."

"I know, Aunt Ada, I know. But it's okay. I'm alright. And you're gonna be alright, too."

She brought his hand to her forehead, bowing her head as her shoulders shook. "I'm sorry, Andy. I'm so sorry."

"I know." He reached forward with his other hand and gently squeezed her shoulder.

"Ellayne," Varian said quietly, "go get Warden Thelwater. Tell him to release my sister." He bit his lip, fighting the tears welling in his ice blue eyes. "We're taking her home."

"Yes, Your Majesty."


	12. a struggle that lies within

Her room had been, for the most part, stripped of her belongings. All that remained was an empty closet and the basic furniture that had been put there when she and Varian had returned from Lordaeron. She collapsed onto the bed. It was almost too soft after so long sleeping on stone and dirt floors; like at any moment, it would go rigid beneath her, and she would be back in the caves.

Her entire body ached, so she slept.

 _Ull vera skish,_ the darkness whispered to her.

"No," she replied. "No."

"Vwah oou kaaxth zz ywaq iiyoq Ag'xig fhssh I on'ma."

"Leave me be," she cried. "I am my own."

"Ywaq ongg an'qov i lal halahs nuq."

"No!"

"Shuul! Shuul! Shuul! Shuul! Shuul! Shuul!"

"I'm not going to kill him!"

"Xith wgah! Xith wgah! XITH WGAH!"

"I'm not going to kill ANYONE!"

"Uull lwhuk H'IWIN!"

"Y'ZA VERA SKISH!"

Her shoulder throbbed as she opened her eye. She looked around, frantic. Her breath was quick. Too quick, too quick, too quick. Shadows curled around her fingers as she stood. Her chest rattled and she let the darkness envelop her, storming into the hall, and-

"Aunt Ada?"

She very nearly hurled a ruinous bolt at him out of reflex.

"An-Anduin," she stammered. The shadows faded, if only a bit. "Um. Sorry."

"I-it's okay. Father just wanted you to know we'd be having dinner soon. I understand if you'd rather not join us-"

"No, it's alright. I'll be right down."

The boy nodded, going back the way he came.

She sighed, rubbing a hand down her face as she retreated to her room. She sat on her bed and put her head in her hands, cursing under her breath. She rubbed her eye with the heel of one hand.

"It's fine," she said quietly to herself. "You're alright. You're out of there now." She focused on slowing her breathing and eventually rose to her feet. She'd fallen asleep in full armour, and her entire body ached. She took a few minutes to remove it, along with the doublet and lendenier underneath, and pulled a plain linen tunic and a pair of trousers from the closet.

"It's just dinner," she assured. "You can do this." 

* * *

"Father, you're shaking the whole table."

Varian paused in the bouncing of his leg, lifting his chin from his head. "I am?"

Anduin nodded to his father's glass of wine. It was just starting to settle.

"Ah." He took a long drink from it.

"Dad?"

"Yes?"

"It'll be alright."

The king nodded absently.

As the hinges of the door to the dining hall squeaked open, Anduin rose to his feet with a warm smile. "Glad to see you made it," he said.

Adariall couldn't help but smile. "Thank you, Andy," she said, and brought him up in a tight embrace. "Come on, then. I'm starving. What're we having?"

"Roasted quail," Varian answered. "Your favourite."

"We were going to have salmon, but when we learned you were alive, Father sent me down to the kitchens to have them switch it out." He laughed. "They were furious when I told them he wanted a cake, too."

"Vari, you didn't have to-"

"Yes I did; it's the Princess Royal's birthday. And she's finally back home with us." He raised his half-full glass of wine in a toast. "To the House of Wrynn," he declared. "And to my sister."

Adariall smiled a bit shyly, but raised her glass nonetheless. "To the House of Wrynn."

"To the House of Wrynn, and Aunt Addie!" 

The three of them drank, Adariall and Varian laughing when Anduin recoiled and nearly spat his wine back into his glass. He placed it much farther from himself than it had been before.

"You okay?" Adariall asked through her laughter.

Anduin nodded, though he was still grimacing. "Fine," he said, unconvincingly. "Light, how do you  _drink_ that?"

"Like this." Varian took a large swig. He laughed as his son stuck his tongue out in exaggerated disgust.

"Varian," Adariall began after they'd started eating, "does anyone know yet? About me?"

Varian, his mouth filled with honey bread, shook his head. He swallowed. "The guards were sworn to secrecy, and Ellayne agreed to keep it quiet, as well. I thought it would be best to get you settled back in before we told the city. Why?"

"Just wondering."

Anduin's gaze flicked between his father and his aunt.

"Did you want them to know right away? We could let them know tomorrow morning. I'll-"

"No, no! It's not that." She focused back on her food. "Forget I said anything."

"Adariall-"

"Varian." Her gaze was set in stone. "Drop it. Please."

The two siblings glared at one another for a short time.

"Alright."

"Thank you."

Anduin coughed as quietly as he possibly can, quickly stuffing his mouth with meat.

Adariall sighed and turned to her nephew. "So how's your training been going?" She asked. "I hope you've been keeping up with your studies."

Anduin was grateful for the change in topic. "Bolvar's been training me," he told her. "He's a masterful paladin; it's wonderful to study with him."

"Good call, Varian," Adariall commented. She couldn't help but notice the way he tensed when she said it. "Is something wrong?"

"The decision wasn't mine," the king said lowly. "I was . . . elsewhere."

"What do you mean?"

He sighed. "I was abducted, from what I can tell, by the Defias Brotherhood," he explained. "I was split in half; one part with my memories, but no willpower, and the other completely amnesiac, but stubborn as an ox."

"That one was called Lo'gosh," Anduin supplied. "They fought  _constantly_. It was absurd."

"Anduin."

"Well, it was! For a while, both were convinced the other was an imposter."

Adariall smiled. "Am I going to have the pleasure of meeting Lo'gosh?"

"You already have. We were brought back into one being."

"Damn."

"Ada!"

"I'm just saying; it might've been fun!"

Anduin laughed as his father dragged a hand down his face to hide his own smile.

"Not the point," Varian chastized though poorly-suppressed laughter. "Light, I've missed having you around."

"Aw, you love me."

"Be quiet."

"You love your sister," she teased.

"Remember, Adariall; you speak to your king."

"You're my little brother first."

Varian bit the inside of his lip to keep himself from laughing. He hung his head to hide his smile.

"I can still see your dumb grin." 

He turned away from his sister, shoulders just barely shaking. "I'm not grinning."

"Prove it."

He chanced a look at her. It only took a few seconds before he was laughing loudly, along with his sister and son.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *shath'yar for "you are mine."  
> "i exist in the twitch of your spine."  
> "your husk serves a new master now."  
> "you are my servant."  
> "kill! kill! kill! kill! kill! kill!  
> "extermination! extermination! EXTERMINATION!"  
> "the darkness devours ALL!"  
> "I AM MY OWN!"


	13. i don't know how this one ends

The scroll of parchment was heavy in her hands. She sighed as she read it over, eventually crumpling it into a ball and tossing it aside to pick up her pen once more. She pursed her lips. _To my family,_ she wrote, her letters flowing and graceful. _I'm sorry to leave you once again, but I fear that the Shadow Council's influence remains in my mind._

_The last six months have been some of the best I've ever had since the Siege of Stormwind. It's been wonderful to be home with the two of you again after so much time away. But the things I have seen and done are far too terrible and great to be forgotten so easily. I fear that I will wake one day to find myself over one of you with a knife in my grasp or my hands around your throat in an attempt to silence the whispers of the old ones that plague my mind._

_I do not wish to harm either of you. That is why I must go._

_I need time. Time to myself, mostly, so that I can heal without fearing that I will harm those whom I love most; the two of you._

_Do not go looking for me. I am doing this for your protection. This is not the end of our family by any means, it is simply something that I must face on my own. I will return to you in my own time. I swear it._

_Varian, you are a great king. You know me as you know yourself; my counsel will always be with you in your heart. I have complete faith in your ability to lead._

_Anduin, you are growing into a fine young man. Stick to your guns, even when that means butting heads with my little brother. Do not give up on your training. You have a true gift. Do not waste it._

_You are great leaders in your own rights and even greater men. I know that you will lead the Alliance to greatness, and I will be watching from afar the whole way._

_You needn't work to make me proud; I am already humbled by each and everything you do. Simply take care of yourselves and of each other._

_Should the Light forbid I see you again in life, know that I love you both beyond measure, and that I died fighting for those members of our Grand Alliance who could not fight for themselves._

_-Adariall Gwenevire Wrynn_

She sighed as she read over the most recent draft of her letter, worrying her lip with her teeth. A quick glance through her window informed her that it would be morning soon, so she set down her pen and rubbed her eyes with the heels of her hands. "It'll have to do," she muttered, then stood to finish her packing. By the time she was done, the ink had dried, and she folded the letter to seal it with deep blue wax. She paused, however, just before she poured the ink, and left her room as quietly as possible, slinking through the stone corridors in careful silence. She eventually reached the pavilion at the end of the keep's northwest wing and picked a couple of peaceblooms from around the base of one of the trees. It was there that she sealed the letter, one of the tiny flowers embedded in the Stormwind Lion's face while the others formed a sort of crown. She left it on the throne and took one last look over her shoulder before disappearing into the quiet night. 

* * *

Anduin watched as his father came into the dining hall, parchment in hand. He sat up on his heels and tried to get close enough to read it for himself over his plate of eggs and sausage. "What's that?"

"It's from Adariall." Varian's voice was tense. "She's run away."

"What?!" Anduin quickly snatched the letter from his father and read it over. His shoulders sank. "Father, I-"

"I'm fine," the king interrupted. A pause. "Are you?"

Anduin wouldn't look at him. He shrugged passively before speaking. "Dad?"

Varian sighed through his nose. "Yes, Andy?"

Anduin bit his lip. "Are you sure you're okay?"

Varian stabbed at his eggs for a moment. "As much as I can be." 

 


	14. (how this one ends)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> fbbbbbbbbbbbb i lost this chapter and deadass almost lost interest in the fic as a whole but HERE WE GO

The Draenei arrived, seeking refuge from the Burning Legion. She journeyed to the far-flung land of Draenor, which she'd heard stories of when she was a girl, when Garona's name brought a feeling of hope rather than a dull, burning ache in the socket of her eye. She awoke most mornings with dread pooled in her stomach, momentarily believing herself to be back in the deep system of caves. She ran.

The Lich King awoke, raising fallen heroes of the Horde and Alliance alike to fight under the banner of his undead Scourge. She journeyed to Northrend, thankful to be back on her own home world. She was part of the final assault on Icecrown Citadel, and on a man she had once considered one of her best friends. He didn't recognize her, but it still made her hands shake and her legs weak when all was said and done. She ran.

The world was torn asunder by Deathwing, bringing Stormwind Park with it. She returned home for the first time in years, if only to mourn those she'd once known. She stormed off with fellow champions of the Alliance to slay Onyxia, who had poisoned her brother's mind when he was too weak to fight her off and very nearly killed her nephew. She helped to bring down the Worldbreaker himself and watched proudly from the sidelines as they hung his head above the gates of the city. But she knew she couldn't stay, lest her family think she had returned for good. She ran.

The mists parted to reveal the land of Pandaria, which was immediately brought into conflict by the Alliance and Horde. She journeyed to the mysterious nation and the flame of her fury was rekindled at the prospect of battling the Horde once more. Her priorities shifted, however, when she saw her nephew beneath the rubble of the Divine Bell. A tauren and a druid in ursine form (neither of whom she bothered to identify) helped her free him from the debris. She ran.

She ran until her lungs burned. She ran until she felt like her legs would give out beneath her. She ran until she felt like she was dying. But she didn't stop. She handed him over, carefully, gingerly, but refused to leave his side. The light weaved between her fingers as she held one of his mangled hands in both of her own, slowly stitching his bones back together while he slept.

Adariall almost glared, brows furrowed, murmuring Thalassian hymns under her breath as she focused on the bones in his forearm. His eyelids slowly fluttered open.

"Aunt Ada?"

It took a moment, but she eventually looked up from her work. "Yes?"

"Are you back for good now?"

She sighed. "I don't know, Andy."

Anduin was quiet for a moment before he spoke again. "Father misses you."

"I know. I miss him too."

"Then why don't you come home?"

She bit the inside of her lip. "I'm scared," she confessed. "I don't want to hurt anyone I love, and the list only grows shorter."

Anduin shifted, hissing through his teeth as he did.

"Are you-?"

"I'm fine," he assured her. "Don't worry."

She laughed hollowly. "Don't worry. You sound like your father. How the fuck am I supposed to not worry about you? Every bone in your body was shattered, Anduin Llane Wrynn. You're still just a child." She took no notice of the hot tears dripping down her cheeks. "I don't want to lose you, too."

He put his other hand, still splinted, over both of hers, and looked her in the eye. "Aunt Ada, after you left, Father was killed by assassins of the Twilight's Hammer."

Every muscle in her body tensed. Her voice was small. "What?"

"And yet he lives," Anduin continued. "I saved his life. I brought him back from the hands of death itself." He smiled, still proud at the memory. "You're not going to lose either of us if I have any say in it."

Adariall stared at him for a long time. Eventually, a smile spread across her face, and she lifted his hands to her forehead. "You successfully performed a resurrection before you'd even turned fifteen?" She laughed. "There are wielders of the light who study for  _decades_  and still sometimes fail to bring back those who still live."

The boy smiled. "I learned from the best," he offered.

She moved to smack his arm, but thought better of it, still laughing as she shook her head. "Kiss-ass," she chided, but her grin never faltered.

Anduin laughed weakly, then grimaced, his broken ribs still bruised and sore and making it hard to even breathe. "I've missed you," he said.

"Same to you," she replied. She kissed her nephew's knuckles through the bandages and rubbed them with the pad of her thumb. "I think I've made up my mind, actually."

"Hm?"

"I'm going to stay by your side, at the very least until my brother gets here. After that, though . . ."

Anduin's hopeful smile fell.

"I think I'll have to stay here in Pandaria, at least for a while. Garrosh Hellscream is still out there somewhere. He needs to pay for what he's done to you." She smiled sheepishly. "But I'll come home as soon as he does, alright?"

The prince's face split into a grin. He reached out and pulled his aunt into as tight of a hug as he could manage. She returned the gesture with the utmost care to not harm him further.

"Thank you, Aunt Addie," he whispered.

She kissed his forehead. "Of course, Andy." 

* * *

Varian was there by portal that very day. He pushed past anyone and everyone who tried to stop him, though they only tried to explain what happened. "Out of my way," he barked. "I need to see my son."  _He's the only family I have left_. 

He slammed the door to the next room open, all but splintering the wood. There lay his son, asleep in bed, with a paladin, armed from head to toe, slowly allowing the Light in her hands to soak through him. She tensed, whirling to glare at him.

"Who the fuck do you think you are?" She hissed. "He's suffering enough without you making all that damned racket!"

"I think I'm your king," he retorted. "You have no right to speak to me like that."

"I think I have every right to do so, actually." She removed her helm and held it under her arm. "Anyone can tell he needs rest above all."

Varian's breath hitched. "Ad-?"

"I understand you're worried about him; we all are. It's going to take months, maybe  _years_ for him to recover." She sighed. "Many of the others think that he will bear some extent of this pain for the rest of his life, Vari. The least we can do for now is simply leave him to heal."

Varian's brow furrowed. His mouth was a thin line across his face. He pinched the bridge of his nose and let out a sigh. "I know," he said. His voice was oddly soft. He sat on the edge of his son's bed and reached to put a hand on his, but hesitated. It clenched into a fist and he pressed it into his thigh. "But he will recover."

"Of course. He's just as bull-headed as you are."

Varian chuckled. "It's good to see you again," he said with a smile.

"You too," she replied, and ruffled his hair. "I figured it was high time I came back home."

"You're serious?"

"Of course. The Pandaren are a wonderful people, and I've taken some of their teachings to heart. It's helped immensely in reigning in my shadowy tendencies. I see no reason to stay away any longer. From here on, I'll go where you go."

Varian stood and pulled his sister into a bone-crushing hug. "I'm glad," he whispered.

"Me too." She returned the gesture, which only made him hold her tighter. She pulled up against his ribs, trying to lift him from the floor as she had when they were children. He laughed and did the same.

 


End file.
